Mood swing, or Holiday overload?
I'm very good at keeping those times when my hormones rage and turn my emotions into a roller coaster hidden from others. If I feel a mood shift coming on, or find myself suddenly overcome with the need to cry, I usually find a quiet spot and wait it out. If I'm at work when one hits, I go into my office, shut the door, and let the tidal wave peak and ebb. Many times, for some strange diurnal reason, the shift occurs when I wake up in the morning. I'm make tea with tears cascading down my cheeks, and listening to the morning news reports will send me into shakes and quakes of sorrow - even if there is a happy story being related! My point is that most of the times the shifts occur, no one else is witness to them.
Yesterday that streak ended.
While visiting with relatives for the holidays, I was suddenly overcome with a sense of melancholy that did not fit in with the festive occasion. I was unable to isolate myself until it passed and had to endure it while others around me, including my husband, were all talking and interacting happily. My husband noticed my mood, and when asked what was wrong, I could not reply without tears threatening.
He misinterpreted my silence as anger and thought I was mad at him, or about something going on. My mood had deteriorated to the point where coherent speech was impossible, and despite my best efforts at control, I quite literally lost it. Now my hubby was convinced he had done something to make me so crazed. When I could reign it in, I told him, through sobs, that I was having a mood swing. He was dumbfounded because he'd never seen me experience one before. I told him I usually keep them to myself or that they occur during times when I am alone. To say he was understanding and compassionate would be a profound understatement. He quite literally astounded me with how kind and gentle he was about it.
In that instant I learned a valuable lesson. If you don't tell people what is going on with you, most of them will misinterpret your actions. Where I chose to protect the people I love the most from my moods, thinking they would be uncomfortable or unsupportive of the negativity and emotions swirling from me, the exact opposite is true. This is a good lesson to learn for life in general. I think we all tend to underestimate people and their capacity for kindness. I know I certainly do.
The next time I am ravaged with an emotional upheaval, if I am around loved ones when it occurs, I will tell them what is going on with me so that no one thinks they have done something to cause the shift in equilibrium.
Never underestimate the kindness, support, and understanding of the people who love you. Especially during menopause, when all bets about your emotional state are off!
Yesterday that streak ended.
While visiting with relatives for the holidays, I was suddenly overcome with a sense of melancholy that did not fit in with the festive occasion. I was unable to isolate myself until it passed and had to endure it while others around me, including my husband, were all talking and interacting happily. My husband noticed my mood, and when asked what was wrong, I could not reply without tears threatening.
He misinterpreted my silence as anger and thought I was mad at him, or about something going on. My mood had deteriorated to the point where coherent speech was impossible, and despite my best efforts at control, I quite literally lost it. Now my hubby was convinced he had done something to make me so crazed. When I could reign it in, I told him, through sobs, that I was having a mood swing. He was dumbfounded because he'd never seen me experience one before. I told him I usually keep them to myself or that they occur during times when I am alone. To say he was understanding and compassionate would be a profound understatement. He quite literally astounded me with how kind and gentle he was about it.
In that instant I learned a valuable lesson. If you don't tell people what is going on with you, most of them will misinterpret your actions. Where I chose to protect the people I love the most from my moods, thinking they would be uncomfortable or unsupportive of the negativity and emotions swirling from me, the exact opposite is true. This is a good lesson to learn for life in general. I think we all tend to underestimate people and their capacity for kindness. I know I certainly do.
The next time I am ravaged with an emotional upheaval, if I am around loved ones when it occurs, I will tell them what is going on with me so that no one thinks they have done something to cause the shift in equilibrium.
Never underestimate the kindness, support, and understanding of the people who love you. Especially during menopause, when all bets about your emotional state are off!
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